An Unlikely Porn Star

Get everything ready before you start

Ok this is some cheese porn for all of you who want to indulge in a cheese fest but aren’t allowed to this Christmas. The ‘illegal’ soft cheese was scoffed too quickly to be digitally immmortalised, here are two beauties I managed to capture.

Get everything ready before you start. Make festive shaped oatcakes, lay the table, break open crisp fresh crackers, mature home made chutney, fruit cake and fresh fruit. The supper thick beautifully carved oak trencher was made by my sculptress grandmother for my mother and uncle to eat their tea off. I love the feeling of utility and history, generations of my family using her beautiful trenchers every day.

Mature organic Red Leicester a million miles from soapy shrink wrapped supermarket cheese

My latest discovery, blue cheese with gingerbread biscuits, thanks to my Scandinavian friend for sign posting this new delight.

Scandi gourmet, blue cheese with gingerbread biscuits

I added 30g toasted sesame seeds to the recipe below.


  • 175g fine or medium oatmeal
  • 50g plain flour
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1/4tsp bicarbonate of soda
  • 35g butter
  • 2tbsp boiling water
  1. Mix dry ingredients together in a bowl. Melt fat in boiling water.
  2. Stir into dry ingredients and knead lightly to make a firm dough, if it needs extra water add a few drops.
  3. Roll dough thinly between two sheets of bakewell paper. The dough dries out quickly, keep unrolled pastry covered with damp towel ‘til ready to use.
  4. Cut into shapes and place on a baking sheets lined with bakewell paper.
  5. Bake in a hot oven 200c for 15mins. Remove biscuits to cooling rack.


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